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Using Positives to Sandwich the Negatives and have Tastier Feedback

A friend gave me a great lesson in relationship communication a few years ago. I redid my whole website; myself, personally, alone.  It was a chore as I’m not a technophile, and I was pretty proud of it. Anyway, the first day I struggled for over five hours through technical jargon, downloading, reconfiguring, and coding. 

Relationship Stress – Is it a Threat or a Challenge?

One day I had a wonderful experience– someone posted a negative and derogatory comment on my blog! I bet you are asking, “What makes that wonderful?” It is great because a comment like that means my message is touching someone.  It means what I wrote hit a nerve or made someone think.  Maybe that reader

Taking and Making Time to Cherish Your Relationship

The other day I met an acquaintance for lunch.  As we talked she mentioned how difficult it is to get together with people these days.  “It seems people don’t have the time to do things like this, meet for lunch with friends.”  We mused about how people have filled their lives with “doing things” and

Change your Thinking and Use the Key!

“Why don’t you take my car to work today?” So began an upsetting, frustrating, and (years later) very funny morning which taught me the importance of “change your thinking”.  It had snowed, and my husband offered to start his car to defrost for me.  He’d lock it, leave in my truck, and I could use

Relationship Skills – too easy or too difficult?

As you know, I teach relationship skills or techniques to couples.  I review a skill, and they practice it right in my office.  Everyone says the technique makes sense and they can use it.  I suggest strongly they practice it between sessions and they agree.  We all leave with a plan – their homework to

Speaking about Difficult Truths in your Relationship

There is an interesting article in Psychology Today that you can learn a bunch from.  Researchers looked at how receptive people are to hearing “difficult truths” when they are either in a good or bad mood.  Seems you are more likely to want to hear the tough stuff when you are in a good mood

When “Helping” Isn’t – Keeping Relationship Boundaries

The Helping Trap Have you ever tried to help someone and ended up telling them what to do?  Have you ever been helpful by explaining to your partner what is “wrong” with them, that they are sick in some way?  Explained how they are messing up and what they need to do to be healthy? 

Relationship Change: Going the Distance

A few years back I had a great time in Arizona (these are all pictures I took.)  I went for my mmmth birthday- a big one with a zero at the end (you can guess which one).  I decided to hike down into the canyon to the river and then back out to celebrate living

Relationship Travel – Time of Torture or Vacation Va-Voom?

Are you thinking about upcoming travel?  The days are getting warmer here and I am.  Do you try to shove too many things into your days on vacation?  I do, and usually it isn’t fun. It may seem “natural” to multitask and keep a ton of things juggled into the air, but it negatively affects

Relationship Choices – Choose Can or Choose Can’t

Abraham Lincoln once said, “Most people are as happy as they make their minds up to be,” and if anyone knew the truth of these words, he did.  He was a man who sadly chose war to create what he knew was right, even though he knew thousands of the people who put him in

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Thanks for the Pictures!

Many of the pictures seen on this blog come from http://www.publicdomainpictures.net/ They have great photographers who put their work in the public domain for uses such as this. Go check them out, and if you like a photographer, buy him/her a cup of coffee!

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